Everything happens for a reason. Always look on the bright side. Find the silver lining. Turn that frown upside down. Be grateful for what you have, because there’s always someone worse off than you.
I’m sure all these phrases are very familiar. And, as a generally positive bear, who loves to spread joy and happiness to all humans, you might think they would be very much part of my repertoire.
But – while I do believe in appreciating the small things in life and looking for ways to be happy, I’m also aware that, sometimes, it’s appropriate and necessary to acknowledge when things are not so great.
Sometimes, people telling you – or you telling yourself – not to dwell on sadness or fear or anger is counter-productive and can actually make you feel much worse.
Your feelings arise for a reason – they help you process difficult situations and the only way to truly get through something bad happening is to let those feelings out. Pushing them down, dismissing them or berating yourself for having them is only going to create more problems further down the line.
One of the things my humans, Annie and Dave, struggle with most is that they always want to fix things when the other one is having a problem. And I love that about them – they want each other to be healthy, happy, and harmonious and they’re both very good at coming up with ways to make things better.
But it’s important to remember that there are times when the people you love – and indeed yourself – just need support and sympathy, an acknowledgement that their feelings are valid – and a big, squishy hug!
So, remember to be kind to yourself whenever you’re having a tough time. You don’t always have to put on a brave face. You don’t always have to set your feelings aside and get on with your life. It’s okay not to be okay – and it’s okay to feel your feelings fully and rest in a state of unhappiness while you allow yourself to heal.
That way, when you’re ready, you can come out the other side stronger and better able to find the positive again.
Give it a try and let me know how you get on, or if there’s anything in your life you’d like my thoughts on!
You can email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
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